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4chon OC competition with a cash prize. Not exclusive to /r9k/! Voting now open!

Amazing new stee stickers. 100% free!

File: 1364131403939.png (57.9 KB, 1275x1650, stee-theworst.png)

No.1104281StickyLocked[Reply]

Prize
The winner will get the equivalent of $250 USD in Bitcoins, an anonymous decentralized virtual currency which can easily be exchanged for cash. Th runner-up will recieve $50 in Bitcoins.

Criteria
Your submission can either be a picture, video, audio file or text. It must be original content, and related to 4chon's culture, history, in-jokes, or userbase. Voting will be based on creativity and general awesomeness/popularity.

Voting
Voting will be commenced in two weeks time (Monday, April 8 at 12:00am EST). Users will be able to vote for their favorite five (possibly ten) submissions, and the submission with the most votes wins. If there's a tie, submissions with low vote counts will be eliminated until a winner emerges.

Simply post all your submissions in this thread. If you'd like to submit a video, upload it to a video-sharing site like YouTube and link to it. For audio, you can use vocaroo.com.

To avoid confusion, you must leave an e-mail address or Bitcoin address with your post (or use a tripcode); otherwise it will be deleted!

This thread is posted on /r9k/ because it's all about OC, but users from all boards are invited to enter the competition.

(I won't abandon it this time. I promise.)
145 posts and 73 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1111586

Voting now open: http://4chon.net/vote.html

To mods: Don't delete this thread. The voting page needs it to survive.



File: 1369328674527.jpg (76.31 KB, 631x720, YES.jpg)

No.1128446[Reply]

are there any other good sites like 4chon ? or is everyone here an unprecedented special snowflake ?
2 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128454

>>1128453
Weeeell, I use Facebook all day long it's sooo good lol

Like when I am with my friends I just can't help myself checking facebook every other sec on my smartphone :P

No.1128459

File: 1369330007104.png (1.37 KB, 33x33, ¦3.png)

there's a site called Twitter you can download, and once you have it installed, you can hassle celebrities and try to make them quit the internet

watch out though, cos celebrities are better than everybody else, so they can get the internet-police to come get you in real life

No.1128471

there's this cool site called 4chan, it's kind of like 4chon

No.1128479

>>1128471
It used to be awesome till FBI and newfags ruined it.

No.1128509

>>1128446
I read manga at kissmanga.



File: 1369260846417.jpg (74.22 KB, 484x718, natalie-portman-hot.jpg)

No.1128141[Reply]

Post a more beautiful woman than Natalie Hershlag.

Protip: you can't
9 posts and 3 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128182

>>1128143
if you liked the movie I hope you saw the extended version.

He takes matilda on cleanings and shows her how to kill 3 people.

No.1128243

File: 1369281773264.png (366.68 KB, 450x600, zoekimball.png)

here we are

>bl

No.1128503

>>1128144
Is there one? In the old days we just went to 4chan.

No.1128506

>>1128182
I have that one.

No.1128508

>>1128243
>post pic of large nosed whore in an attempt to compete with a beautiful jewess



File: 1369331828394.jpg (18.64 KB, 400x400, 1351588020458.jpg)

No.1128472[Reply]

Cutbots, why aren't you restoring your foreskin? You know how to no-fap, you know how to follow a workout routine, and you probably resent having your dick mutilated by the Jewish corporate medical industry.

http://www.restoringforeskin.org/beginners-guide-foreskin-restoration
http://www.restoringforeskin.org/public/manual-tugging/method-2
2 posts omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128498

>>1128477
Do you also like
>tight, painful erections
>hairy shaft
>keratinized penis head
>early-onset erectile dysfunction

And no, it doesn't make you a Jew, you'd have to be born to a Jewish family to be a Jew. Jews also circumcised some of their non-Jewish slaves, so you're that. You're primarily a victim of the American medical industry and Christ-insanity.

No.1128501

>>1128498
>Christianity
Circumcision has nothing to do with Christianity. In Europe, only Jews and Muslims are cut.
Anyway, being a Eurofag I'm obviously not cut. I used to be unaware that most of America is cut and could never get the association between lubrication and masturbation in popular culture.

No.1128502

What's the point? I wish my foreskin weren't removed, but it's not like the nerves are going to be restored.

No.1128504

File: 1369334974182.jpg (21.98 KB, 400x320, image.jpg)

I really wish I had one. They look like fun.
but I think restoration would not be like the real thing so why bother.

No.1128507

>>1128502
this. I wonder if pulling back my uncut foreskin habitually has caused much nerve loss since it and the head are more exposed to friction
while we're on the subject of dicks, do you ever lose erections after stopping yourself from cumming? I lose all sensitivity and go soft after the first or second time of holding an orgasm in, during either sex or masturbation. it kind of makes sense why it would happen but it makes edging pointless. way do



File: 1369288074951.jpg (46.47 KB, 350x400, image.jpg)

No.1128263[Reply]

that feel when in your mid 30s but have the mind of a teenager
3 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128273

File: 1369289219530.jpg (50.44 KB, 477x364, 945.jpg)


Don't feel too bad. Every older adult feels the same way.
Your mind stays the same, it's just your body which ages. At least you can say you've gained experience compared to a true teenagers mind.

No.1128277

>>1128273
Not sure if that's the case. How many 35 year olds would enjoy browsing /r9k/? They would think it childish and stupid but I find it interesting.

No.1128279

>>1128269
Easy. A mod was putting pieces together and making his/herself feel better by pointing out older posters, that made mistakes when they were younger, but spend their little spare time trying to help younger people with their same outlook/"mental illnesses." I'm not 15 but I sure as fuck now what its like to be that age and to be of above average intelligence. Most teachers are feminist cunts and have been. Id imagine its good to hear the insights of people who have lived through it.

No.1128462

I'm 27 in June. I know this feel OP.

No.1128505

Feels 21 and mature, bro



File: 1369301670125.jpg (106.16 KB, 251x359, 1.jpg)

No.1128323[Reply]

/r9k, I have a proposition. How about in "true robot" style, no fucks given, we have a "get your faggot ass to the gym" day?

I summon Phagtasm, HDV, Lunchbox, Locknar, that guy who looks like his body is eating his head on /edu, etc… To create a workout plan that INITIALLY skips the embarrassing lifts for beginners such as "deadlifts", "squats", "pull ups" etc.. but gives time for "comfort" to be reached with the gym. Then those can come into play.

How about by monday, if you can get to a gym, we'll all be ready to take the plunge? BTW if you want to do dead lifts and all that that is fine.. I don't think that normal "robots" would be comfortable walking into a gym and immediately dead lifting and squatting. So… do any of you liftfags want to help with tis? Are any robots interested? You should be. We're all running out of time.
12 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128386

>>1128367
I cannot listen to this guy. /r9k/ is a goddamn joke.

Just brpwse /fit/ for a while.

No.1128387

>>1128323
wat makes you think i don't go to the gym?

No.1128393

>>1128367
>>1128367
>who want your big piece of wood

lurld

No.1128411

>>1128338
I weigh ~65 kg and I go to the gym quite often. Don't be intimidated

No.1128500

Just do calesthinics. You don't even need to leave home.



File: 1369332344436.jpg (30.46 KB, 640x480, 972895_4929038620803_199175141…)

No.1128475[Reply]

Rate my gf's ass.

No.1128476

Too wide.

No.1128480

2/10 mite let a bbc fuk it

No.1128485

1/10 no ass pancake booty

No.1128487

The bulge in between the legs troubles me.

Nice ass, OP.

No.1128499

>>1128487
You don't like girls with balls? What are you a cisbigot or something?



File: 1369321542869.jpg (2.4 MB, 4281x3424, 1369320895588.jpg)

No.1128403[Reply]

Rose Thread

>128 Seconds of my life that I'll never have back. I hope you're happy, Robot.
1 post omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128410

>>1128407
Of course. I miss her streams ;_;

No.1128418

>>1128410
>Still assuming shoe is rose
>2010

No.1128422

File: 1369324417957.gif (1.51 MB, 250x176, into the depths we lol.gif)

>>1128418
>still falling for this countertroll

No.1128492

So nothing new since the last and final vyou session? ;_;

No.1128497

>>1128407
>>1128418
>>1128422
There's an easy way to tell Shoe and Rose apart: dick size.



File: 1369014088888.jpg (36.6 KB, 500x619, Jello+Biafra.jpg)

No.1127046[Reply]

So I'm trying to record a punk album over the summer and I'm a one man band.

Bought an Audiobox to record from and it works great but I fucked up my first song because I didn't stay in time. I should've realized when my bars didn't line up with each other.

But now I'm in a pickle. I can't fucking figure out tempos to save my life. I was told that the average punk rock beat is 160-200bpm which for me sounds WAAAYYY too slow for my style of punk.

In the song countdowns where they say "1-2-3-4!" on the albums that influenced me I've been able to figure out that its around 300bpm but I think this must be a grave error and that I just suck.

Like I'm so confused. What if I'm playing a song at 200bpm, 4/4 time and 4 quarter notes a bar. Then what if I go down to 100bpm in 4/4 and play 8 half notes, would that not be equivalent? So do I want fast tempo or slow?

Help me out and I'll share my album with you all when it's done. You'll like it, it talks about /r9k/ topics.

Here's an example: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eLCYQK0CnPM
50 posts and 5 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1127398

>>1127376
There's nothing "retarded" about. Melodies weren't meant to be bound by vowels and consonants. You fit the words after unless you are a band like tool that takes poetry and fits the music around the ssinger. You either write the lyrics and come up with the vocal melody and fit the music to the melody or you do the reverse case. Unless you're in a band with amazing instrumentals. I think thats why metal exists. What else can you do over those instrumentals? The guitars take all the melody space.

No.1127429

>>1127395
>I do it all the time to beats
>to beats

Pleb detected.

No.1127437

Here is some other advice and links.

www.all-guitar-chords.com
Use the "chord name" tab if you are messing around and play something that sounds good but you dont know the key it would fit in.
Use the "reverse scales" tab if you come up with a riff of bassline and want to know what key you could possibly be in after that go to the "scales to chord tab and enter the scale given by the reverse scale tab to see all the base chords in that key
Use a tuner to sing your melody into and hold the notes you hit on "chord change" beats you will probably be in 4/4 timing always because you probably don't know or recognize any other timings
When you have the notes you can look at the various keys in "scales to chords" and find one that includes all of your notes
After that you click the chords and find one that uses your note and play the 5th chord or you could, for example, use a C major chord while you are singing an A note because the A would harmonize as an Am7 or a C6

ANYWAYS… that site is how I started to learn theory. Just experimenting. That and I have Melodyne and I would just sing my vocals into it > tune them > and then look in the program to see what key it is in XDDDD muh cheats. Anyways fuck off you punk scum. Your music sucks.

No.1127501

Also one more tip. Learn the "open" chords as far as Dmaj,min,min7,maj7,7,7sus4/ Gmaj,maj7,7,6/Amin,min7,min9,Amajsus2,sus4,7,7sus4/Cmaj,maj7,add9,sus2,

ANY FUCKING WAYS.. Learn all of the open chords entirely. Because after you learn them all you need is a capo or to detune your guitar a half or whole step. The open chords are the base for "key changes" on guitar. If you put a capo on fret 1 you change C major to C#/Db Major. Well you you also change other keys but if you are focusing on "open" chords you change C major to C#/Db. If you move it one more fret up you go to Dmajor. Basically beginner guitar should be based on the "caged" method. But don't be a faggot and never learn barre chords.

Or just play punk in 5ths. You'll honestly get laid more. Unless you actually progress to something "impressive." If you arent impressive play 5ths and babble some shit in a grunt voice. Fat chicks for days.

No.1128495

New problem and you're all gonna call me retarded.

Dad got me a present a a few years ago, a red and black telecaster knock off signed by all the members of Dead Kennedys for $80.

Now right away I knew it was a fake. The guitar has no brand or anything located on the head stock, it'd be difficult to track down all the members and get them to sign the guitar, AND all of that would not be worth $80.

So I thought whatever, I got a guitar for $80 bucks. Well trying to get a full clean tone out of it is impossible. I thought maybe it was me but its definitely the shitty guitar.

I've got plans to fix my car this summer so its not like I can go out and buy a nice Stratocaster. Maybe I can borrow from a friend.

I think I'm fucked for awhile.



File: 1369303237395.jpg (39.89 KB, 512x320, cat mwf.jpg)

No.1128335[Reply]

For a while now I've been wanting to do something meaningful and recently have been thinking about something in particular, this idea might be absolutely crazy and stupid because I lack the understanding in a lot of fields but I'll give it a try anyway.

Okay, so everything started one day after reading some material online about the starvation in Africa. It obviously wasn't news to me but it did start a pretty interesting line of thinking.
I went and checked the current population of The US and found out it is just over 315 million. I then did the same thing with other major countries around the globe:
>US: 315,901,000
>Germany: 82,029,000
>UK: 35,056,064
and so on..
I then checked the personal income per person in the US. For people above the age of 25 and those of them who graduated high school it was $26,505 (annually). That's when the idea came to mind.
If every American citizen donates one dollar, one dollar and that's it, just like that you'd have 315 million dollars to do with them whatever you wanted.
Then I thought to myself that the poor probably won't give anything so I checked how many people in the US are considered to be of the Middle Class and found out that it's up to 66% of the households in the US. So now imagine asking just the middle classes and upper classes to donate, but not just a dollar, but lets say ten (which is still nothing for the average person). The amount of money that can be gathered is absolutely amazing. Now think about doing the same, but this time not just with the US but with every single major country around the world. Even if only 20% of all the people asked to do the above actually would, the sum gathered would still be huge.
After that, things like the fact that there are people all over the world who can and (in such situation) would donate much more than ten dollars and so on came to mind..

So what do you think, something on such a huge scale can ever be possible?
How would you even start such a massive operation?
Basically what do you think of such an idea, why or why not it's possible, just discuss.
6 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128440

waht do u think taxes r 4 u butthole, i had the same idea when i was 6

r u 6?
r u?

No.1128468

thats the magic behind goverment, they hade the same idea like you but they did it many many years ago.

you cant copy on what goverment does

No.1128474

>>1128435
>>1128440
>>1128468
You can't compare what the OP is talking about to taxes. This is not how taxes work.

Your taxes pay for the public transportation you're using, it pays for your health even tho you still have to pay health insurance, it pays for your kids education, it pays for the military that protects you and among other things also for overseas development.

If I understand OP correctly, he's talking about a type of charity, a huge one, with a specific cause. Something that isn't run by the government but by the people themselves.

With that being said, OP's idea is wild and unrealistic, it will never be possible to accomplish something this huge.

No.1128478

>>1128474

Property taxes pays for your kids education.
Vehicle registration fees, and licensing pays for public transportation, and highway maintenance on the roads that are publicly owned (hint lots of toll roads are privately owned by corporations outside of the US).

Income taxes mainly pays for social security, medicare/medicaid, welfare, and military spending. It doesn't really do a dime of good for your every day life unless you are on food stamps or other welfare programs. Drone strikes on elementary schools in whogivesafuckistan do fuck all for my well being.

No.1128494

>>1128369
And that is why a ridiculous amount of americans dont pay taxes.

That, and soonmost of them are niggers.



File: 1369333036246.png (126.87 KB, 584x551, 1342790806029.png)

No.1128483[Reply]

>walking down the campus on my way to my dorm
>"hey anon, hold on a minute"
>I see my mate from the corner of my eye
>i turn and at the same time say "hey, what's up, nigger?"
>i complete my 90 degree turn
>my mate didn't even notice me
>my black literature professor is standing in front of me
>he was the one who called me
>i just casually turn and start walking away from him
>my dorm is just ahead and i'm walking the opposite direction because my professor is standing right there
>keep walking away until i spot a turn
>as i turn i get a glance of my professor still standing there looking at me
>i complete an entire circle around the campus and return to my dorm
>mfw i have a lecture with that professor on monday and i'm too embarrassed to show up

**fucking nigger ruined muh day

Share your embarrassing/spaghetti stories ITT.

No.1128488

Anon we have all been there.

>be in class during lunch

>say nigger nigger nigger
>hear voice loudly say don't say that
>turn around and notice my black friend is there
>give lame excuse and leave

No.1128489

apologize to him and explain the situation

ffs not too hard to figure out

No.1128493

File: 1369333920960.jpg (15.54 KB, 187x219, problemofficer.jpg)

>On xbox Live
>singing All Gold everything
>Only get near enough to my mic on the part of the song that goes "Nigga nigga nigga"
>Some darkie gets pissed at me
>starts ranting and raving about the history of nigga
>keep singing "nigga nigga nigga"
>He starts trying to grief me in forza 4
>ramming into me at start line and fucking with my drifts
>Game changes, get in my GMC vandura with "nigga nigga nigga" written all over the sides
>follow him around saying nigga over and over again on the mic
>he starts raging and screaming so loudly he's almost screaming
>pin him against a corner
>he can't get out
>start chanting nigga over and over again
>couple people in the room join in
>everybody chanting
>he quits
>mfw



File: 1369329265100.png (38.03 KB, 213x255, asshole season.png)

No.1128450[Reply]

So in the past few days my shit has been a black-green colour.
Now, don't get me wrong, I've often wished my shit was this colour.
But now I'm wondering what exactly I did different to cause this anomaly.

No.1128455

If your shit is black it means that you have internal bleeding. It's a serious matter, I'd tell you to go to the doctor right away, but I know that you wouldn't want to, so keep posting on chon until it goes away or you die in excruciating pain.

Good luck.

No.1128457

File: 1369329862826.jpg (74.58 KB, 612x612, professional partier.jpg)

>>1128455
It's more like an extremely deep hue of green.

No.1128461

http://ibdcrohns.about.com/cs/otherdiseases/a/greenstool.htm

Green poop isn't all that bad OP… try google next time your poop changes color. Google knows more than us.

No.1128486

Could just be high iron OP. If you take in too much iron, it will turn your poop dark, all the way up to black.

No.1128491

i used to have a racehorse that made green horseshit. are you sure you havent been eating too much grass?



File: 1369333781603.jpg (2.18 MB, 2592x1936, IMG_0480[1].JPG)

No.1128490[Reply]

PROCRASTINATION GENERAL

>important exams in 5 days

>smoke weed all day
>reinstall Titan Quest
>download a dozen movies I haven't seen yet
>get nothing done

There go my exams.

What have you been doing lately that you couldn't really afford to?

pic related, my ashtray after three days


File: 1369330234572.png (17.5 KB, 134x180, cool daddio man doesnt want.pn…)

No.1128460[Reply]

you're walking upstairs after you just made yourself some green tea and you hear a buzzing sound coming from your moms room. You think it could be a home intrusion or zog aliens.

what do you do?
2 posts and 1 image reply omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128465

File: 1369331208740.png (1.37 KB, 33x33, ¦3.png)

>>1128464
once the flesh has been allowed to cure, it's perfect for cutting strips off and making mom-jerky

No.1128467

>>1128465
I need someone elses advice, the noises are getting louder.

No.1128469

xfag is right on this one.

I've been NEET and mom-jerky is very delicious and nutritious.

No.1128470

File: 1369331765936.png (1.38 KB, 33x33, ¦3.png)

>>1128467
there's nobody else here - but don't think of it as me being trapped in here with you

it's more that you're trapped in here with me

No.1128484

File: 1369333106203.jpg (25.85 KB, 300x300, teehee.jpg)

RUN IN THERE RIGHT NOW AND MAKE SURE SHE'S OKAY
Trust me OP, you won't see anything in there you don't want to see…



File: 1369286569730.jpg (10.28 KB, 255x197, images.jpg)

No.1128255[Reply]

So I was reading >>>1128106 and it got me thinking, we should invent our own 4chon language. We could just replace simple words with other words (like qtp2t instead of 4chan's qt or qt3.14), and then work our way up until our posts are impossible for outsiders to read. It would be pretty funny when our words start bleeding into 4chan, and it would be a good way to keep normalfags, newfags, and other undesirables out. It would be like when we're a little kid and making up a secret code to write messages in or talk to our imaginary friends with.
14 posts and 2 image replies omitted. Click reply to view.

No.1128424

File: 1369324579564.jpeg (14.84 KB, 198x254, rosetta.jpeg)

i don't have the working memory to learn a language. i wonder could someone write a greasemonkey script to translate common words into extended ascii characters or unicode and back again then we could all install the dictionary script that would only work on tinyboard. that would prevent all our hard earned subculture from being stolen by other forums.

No.1128437

>>1128424
Maybe we could have the mods set up a wordfilter system, and slowly phase out common words and phrases with other common words and phrases. We could add a new word every week, and by the end of the summer we'll be a really weird place to post on.

No.1128456

We could make thought crime impossible, if only we had control of the language..

No.1128482

File: 1369332888547.png (497 B, 310x310, code.png)

>>1128456
a salient point. it wood be immoral to force a change on everyone but i think an opt in code would be cool. i have seen how qr codes have taken off among the internet elites so the cool kids should do it first and the rest of us will follow

No.1128496

http://userscripts.org/scripts/show/124072

heres a wordfilter that will easily suit our needs on an opt in basis. all we need is a worldlist to modify it with.



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